Maternity leave

So I said in my “My Space” that I would tell ya’ll more about maternity leave (ML) later- I guess now is later!

I took ML a week early because I had some crazy Braxton-hicks and didn’t want to go into labor in front of all my students. Plus, the doctor had told me on Wednesday September 26 that there would be no way I would make it to the weekend; in fact, she would be “SHOCKED” if I had this baby in October… fast forward to a WEEK later, October 3rd! ah, first thing I said when the OB go to the delivery room, “You’d be shocked?!?” Oh well, it makes for a great story, and even better when I add that I went into labor at Walmart (gotta keep it classy afterall!)

Okay, back to ML… everything was going great, except I was exhausted, having trouble breast feeding, awkwardly dealing with all of the family in town, trying to keep the house together, trying to be supermom/wife from the get-go… Okay, so things were hectic and crazy, not really great. In fact, I’ll admit that after bringing home the baby, my husband and I even had an open conversation that could be titled, “what were we thinking?!”

Luckily, within a week, things started to balance out. The extended family went back to normal, my husband went back to work, and here I was with this little-bitty baby, still trying to breastfeed. We had finally fallen into a good routine when BAM! I got mastitis and my supply plummeted. Breast-feeding went from awfully terrible to tremendously impossible! All of this, combined with the fact that I was still trying to be super mom and wife stressed me out… at least, I thought I knew what stress was, until I got a stomach bug ON TOP OF the mastitis. Then, I just couldn’t eat. So here I was, not eating, not sleeping, and in a lot of pain. At 6am on a Friday morning, I collapsed in the kitchen. My husband had to call his mom to come watch the baby, so I could get to the hospital for fluids.

Thank God for Mother-in-laws (said no one before me, ever!) But seriously, thank God for mine. She drove all the way from Houston on a moment’s notice, so I could go get healthy.

After my half-day in the hospital, I felt better and was ready to turn things around. My OB made me quit breast-feeding (I gave it my best shot and it just wasn’t working), I started eating again, and I started taking naps when the baby would sleep, so I could catch up on rest.

So why did I still think I could never be a SAHM? Simple. I was lonely and bored. We had just moved to our new house far north of our previous place; my best friend had just moved to England, and none of my other friends lived near me anymore. Either way, no one else I knew had a baby. So…  I took my baby up to my workplace at least twice a week, just so I could be around people! I just needed some real human contact, and I am not great at meeting new people. Also, moms scared me. I thought, her I am this young mom with w new baby. All other moms are just going to judge me..right? I couldn’t be more wrong! Thanks to a few phone calls with a friend of mine, I was convinced to put myself out there.  I took Bubsy to the “babies and books” program at the library where I met several new moms- including one from my neighborhood. She in turn got me hooked into this neighborhood play date group. Another new mom I met has become my newest close friend, and she recently got me into this ‘exclusive’ new moms meet-up group.

By the time ML was over, I was ready to get back to work and routine, but my new friendships and love for my baby planted the seed of thought that I might just be able to do to SAHM thing.



God’s Will

Romans 8:28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. 

Before I was really ready to confront my husband with the resolve to stay home, I put my options in the Lord’s hands. I prayed for God to send me in the direction the He wanted. Is my calling to stay home and raise my family, or is it to continue teaching, but in a new venue? Shortly after our little chat and the death of my boss, God put it on my heart to stay home. My husband knew I was serious when I came to him with tears in my eyes stating that “I will do whatever it takes, even sell my car”. He knew I was serious when I offered up my precious Acadia, and I think he really was hoping I would make the decision I did because he hugged me and while he held me, said we didn’t have to do that.

Fast forward a couple months later. I put in my notice at work, I told all of my friends, and I started a blog about staying home, and then the phone rings. A certain prominent ISD wants to interview me for a wonderful position. He we go, Lord. Is this a trick? A test? I had applied to this district before I made my decision, and I didn’t pursue it any further thinking I didn’t need to anymore. Also, a few days later, I ran into a neighbor/friend who was trying to help me get a job in my dream ISD- the one in which I reside.  A few months ago, it had appeared that no positions would be available and working in this ISD would be a fay away fantasy… WRONG! She informed me that not only had a position opened up at her school, but also, one opened up on her team, and she could get me an interview. Geeeeezzzzzz….. What is a girl of God supposed to do with that?! I still don’t know. I told her I had decided to stay home, but I am really questioning my decision. I am going to interview next week with the first ISD, and I am hoping that God shows where He wants me to be.